Where the f*ck in America are you when….

You’ve driven through more than half the state and there is not a McDonald’s in site….all we’ve passed by is 25 churches & 13 adult book stores (note: there was a church and an adult book store in the same parking lot)

By the way, we’re somewhere in bumblef*ck Missouri (about half way to St. Louis) and no, we can’t see the arch…..all we see is darkness. Does Missouri have a law against illuminating their highways? I think so.

We’ve been playing iPod Roulette and Captain Chaos is now out of vetos for the rest of the state. I hope we don’t hit a block of Cher, Abba, and Elton John. JJ is driving like a bat out hell, we finally saw a McDonald’s but we passed it up so I guess we’re going to go another 130 miles in search of a cheap cup of coffee.